Tuesday, June 12, 2018

Calling on Hearts Instead of Hotlines: Options for people who care about people

Not long ago, a friend of mine called the National Suicide Hotline.  He was having a hard day and needed his distress to be heard.  He barely got started talking before the operator interrupted him.  It was the standard suicide assessment:
  • Are you suicidal?
  • Do you have a plan?
  • Do you have the means?
  • Have you set a date? 
They also made clear that if he answered the questions as certain way, the 911 van would be dispatched to his residence forthwith.

Frankly, this is why I would never refer someone I loved to a suicide hotline.  If I had any doubt about killing myself before calling, this kind of response would pretty much seal the deal.  There's the basic human insult of getting asked impersonal, pro forma questions like these in my darkest hour at my time of greatest need.  Heap on top of that the public humiliation of getting hauled off to the nut ward by 911, flashing lights and all, for my neighborhood to see, on the worst day of my life.

Yes, not all hotlines and hotline operators are like this, but enough of them are that I, personally, wouldn't risk it.  Suffice it to say:   If I had any shred of a doubt remaining  -- or perhaps a threadbare hope in the good of humanity -- this wholesale warping of the nature of human 'aid', sponsored by my government, funded with my tax dollars, would cut the cord once and for all between me and any lingering desire to live.

So what's the solution....?  After all, this crisis is real.  The pain is real.  The despair is real.  The deaths are real.  Tons and tons of Americans - as well as others worldwide - feel hopeless, worthless, disconnected - as if we have nothing of value to offer and our lives have only become burdens to those we love.

This really is life and death.  So none of us can afford to stick our heads in the sand and pretend anymore:
It isn't me. It isn't someone I love.  It isn't happening. . .
At the same time, the helplessness and confusion about what to do about it is also real.

And that's exactly why peer relationships and peer-developed modalities can be so helpful.  Many, many of us have been there.  Many, many of us know what it is like.  Many, many of us are still alive to talk about it.  We know what we tried, what worked for us and what didn't.  We know what ways of relating gave us hope and helped us to continue on.

Just as important - we know what not to do - what devastated us, wasted precious resources or made life altogether unbearable. As a result of these experiences, we've developed countless approaches for navigating our own distress and that of our friends and families.

This is not to say that all peers are wonderful supporters, that we all magically, intuitively, say the right thing at the right time or invariably make things better instead of worse.  (Definitely not my experience.)  However, we do have some important perspectives and orientations to add to the mix of the available options.

Get Connected

If the idea of peer support appeals to you, or you think it might appeal to someone you love, here's what we offer at Peerly Human (http://peerlyhuman.blogspot.com):

  • Wednesdays, 8:30-10 pm EDT, Deadly Serious: Talking Openly About Suicide 
  • Saturdays, Noon - 1 pm EDT, Deadly Serious: Talking Openly About Suicide 
  • Saturdays, 5-6:30 pm EDT, Intentional Peer Support Practice Series (beginner's welcome!)


Flyer reads: Wednesdays 8:30-10 pm EDT - FREE ONLINE DEADLY SERIOUS: Talking Openly About Suicide (Weekly starting June 13th)  Join by computer:  https://zoom.us/j/119362879 Join by phone: +1 669 900 6833 or +1 646 558 8656 Meeting ID: 119 362 879 International callers: https://zoom.us/u/jkwt3wHh  THE BOTTOM LINES:  1. Come as a human being 2. Come as you (& only you)  3. No pros, no cops, no 911  We Welcome:  ~Your lived experience ~ Your distress ~Your pain ~Your needs ~Your values ~Your ideas & insights about what would work for you  Leave Behind:   ~ Professional roles, reporting obligations and liability concerns ~ Political, social or organizational agendas ~ Opinions about the experiences of others or what is best for them  More info at: peerlyhuman.blogspot.com   Need more resources? Here's a link: http://peerlyhuman.blogspot.com/2018/06/calling-on-hearts-instead-of-hotlines.html   RADICAL REGARD (graphic):  I will train myself to:  1.Believe in you. (You, like me, are here for good reason.) 2.Value your differences. (You, like me, lease a window to view life from.) 3.Honor your journey. (You, like me, are here without a roadmap.) 4.Trust our hearts to lead us. (You, like me, are accountable to your own Truth.)  HUMAN RIGHTS (graphics):  ~We are all born free and equal. ~Everyone has the right to life, freedom and safety ~Everyone is entitled to these rights (no matter our race, religion, nationality…) ~No one can take away any of your rights. ~You have the responsibility to respect the rights of other
Deadly Serious: Talking Openly About Suicide
Flyer reads: INTENTIONAL PEER SUPPORT PRACTICE SERIES SATURDAYS WEEKLY 5-6:30 pm Eastern FREE  ONLINE Beginners Welcome      Learn and Practice Every Week  Real People Real Support Real Life  Join by computer: https://zoom.us/j/119362879 Join by phone:  +1 669 900 6833 or +1 646 558 8656 Enter Meeting ID: 119 362 879 International callers: https://zoom.us/u/jkwt3wHh   About IPS:  Intentional peer support (IPS) is a way of thinking about and being in purposeful relationships. In IPS, we use our relationships to look at things from new angles. We develop a better awareness of personal and relational patterns. We support and challenge each other as we try new things. IPS is different from traditional service relationships because it doesn’t ,start with the assumption of “a problem.” Instead, we learn to listen for how each of us has made sense of our experiences. Together, we create new ways of seeing, thinking, and doing. At the end of the day, it is really about building stronger, healthier communities.  More info (& study guide) at:  peerlyhuman.blogspot.com  Left Graphic: Cover of IPS Workbook [picture of a woman wearing a hoodie with images of a tree, a house and a hand.  She is holding a smaller version of herself in her arms.  Written in cursive on the image is ‘What is forgotten is who we are.  Right Graphic:  IPS Promo Poster [picture of a man in a wheelchair, a woman sitting on the grass listening to him, and another leaning against a tree.  Above them on the branches of the tree reads: “From helping to learning together, individual to relationship, fear to hope and possibility” In the horizon below that “Connection/ Worldview / Mutuality/ Moving Towards”]
Intentional Peer Support Practice Series

3 WAYS TO JOIN

1. Join by computer: https://zoom.us/j/119362879
2. Join by phone: +1 669 900 6833 or +1 646 558 8656  (Meeting ID: 119 362 879) 
3. Local access numbers for International callers: https://zoom.us/u/jkwt3wHh

THE BOTTOM LINES:

1. Come as a human being
2. Come as you (& only you)
3. No pros, no cops, no 911

We Welcome:

~Your lived experience ~ Your distress ~Your pain ~Your needs   ~Your values  ~Your ideas & insights about what would work for you

Leave Behind:

~ Professional roles, reporting obligations and liability concerns
~ Political, social or organizational agendas
~ Opinions about the experiences of others or what is best for them

Video, voice and text are all options.  Call participants are welcome to come and go.  If you come late, please enter quietly and respect the discussion that is going on.


Other online group support options:  

Hearing Voices Network, http://www.hearingvoicesusa.org/

Mutual aid for voices, visions or extreme or unusual experiences
  • Mondays 7-8:30 EDT on Zoom
  • Thursdays 9-10:30 EDT on Zoom
Contact Caroline@westernmassrlc.org for call-in info

Emotions Anonymous, http://emotionsanonymous.org

Twelve Step peer support for emotional extremes



Spiritual Emergence Anonymous, http://spiritualemergenceanonymous.org/

Twelve Step approach to spiritual emergency
  • Sundays, 8 pm EDT on Zoom
  • Mondays, 1 pm EDT on Zoom

Support Groups Central, https://www.supportgroupscentral.com


Support group options (some online) for mood, anxiety, voices and substances, among other things

Other Options

The big picture

1. Peer respites (spaces offering safe respite)

2. Peer support centers

  • Directory of Statewide Peer Organizations, https://power2u.org/consumer-run-statewide-organizations/
  • Examples of what can be done:

3. Alternatives to Suicide

4. Support lines staffed with people who care and want to listen

5. Intentional Peer Support,   http://www.intentionalpeersupport.org/


6. Emotional CPR, http://www.emotional-cpr.org/


7. Wellness Recovery Action Plan (WRAP),  http://mentalhealthrecovery.com/


WRAP plans can be developed specifically for issues like wanting to die.  WRAP plans also support identification of life-promoting, capacity-restoring activities like art, exercise, creativity, writing, social interaction, nutritious eating, meaningful vocation, relaxation, meditation, spiritual development, body work, massage, yoga, dance, etc.

8. Support for veterans 

U.S. vets are dying by suicide almost every hour on the hour every day of every year

9. Support to withdraw from psychiatric drugs


10. Support for creativity and resilience

Better Days International, https://www.facebook.com/groups/280572615798759/
Discussions, collaborations, workshops between experts by experience.

Icarus Project, https://theicarusproject.net
Navigating the space between brilliance and madness
  • Publications:
 Poetry for Personal Power, http://poetryforpersonalpower.com
What helps you navigate adversity?

11. Support for voices, visions and extreme or unusual experiences


12.  Support for human needs and human rights


Other Resources 

Alternatives to Drugs, Shock & Psychosurgery (yes, they still do that!)


Open Dialogue:

Power Threat Meaning Framework

Trauma-Informed Care



Do you know of other helpful resources that respect personhood and treat us as people first...?  Please share!



12 comments:

  1. Tantrik Astrologer Ramdas Ji. in India Best Vashikaran Specialist, Contact Me : +91-9587008635 If you are looking for the cure of your problems with help of vashikaran and black magic then vashikaran specialist ramdas baba ji can be the best motivator in all sorts. You just have to call us and he can perform all the rituals to solve your problem. The spell and mantras of their vashikaran and black magic is too powerful to make your dream come true.

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    Replies
    1. My name is ethan micheal ,am from USA.i want to share my wonderful testimony on how i got back my husband back, who i sworn ever to be with until when he left me to another woman for no reason and i try to make things work for both of us yet things where getting worse and i love him so much and there is nothing i could do to get my husband back until i met a testimony share by a woman called Stella tea from Australia on the internet talking about a powerful spell caster who brought her husband back within 24hours and i decide to give it a try and to my greatest surprise he also did it for me just as he did for Stella and i have a lot of people complaining of fake spell caster but this one i met was a real spell caster who help me to solve my problem i have no solution to,i introduce many of my best friends that have a similar problems,and their problem were solve with the great help of PRIEST WISDOM .who help them to get back their lovers within 24 hours.i am so happy that my husband is back to me again,and the most surprising thing is that our love is very strong,every day is happiness and joy. and there is nothing like been with the man you love.i am so happy my love is back to me with the help of PRIEST WISDOM if you have similar problem i will advice you to contact him ,he is there to help you and put a smile on your face as he did to me and others.contact email supernaturalspell@yahoo.COM or supernaturalspell1@gmail.com you can call /whatsapp him through is mobile number +2348124644470

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      My name is ethan micheal ,am from USA.i want to share my wonderful testimony on how i got back my husband back, who i sworn ever to be with until when he left me to another woman for no reason and i try to make things work for both of us yet things where getting worse and i love him so much and there is nothing i could do to get my husband back until i met a testimony share by a woman called Stella tea from Australia on the internet talking about a powerful spell caster who brought her husband back within 24hours and i decide to give it a try and to my greatest surprise he also did it for me just as he did for Stella and i have a lot of people complaining of fake spell caster but this one i met was a real spell caster who help me to solve my problem i have no solution to,i introduce many of my best friends that have a similar problems,and their problem were solve with the great help of PRIEST WISDOM .who help them to get back their lovers within 24 hours.i am so happy that my husband is back to me again,and the most surprising thing is that our love is very strong,every day is happiness and joy. and there is nothing like been with the man you love.i am so happy my love is back to me with the help of PRIEST WISDOM if you have similar problem i will advice you to contact him ,he is there to help you and put a smile on your face as he did to me and others.contact email supernaturalspell@yahoo.COM or supernaturalspell1@gmail.com you can call /whatsapp him through is mobile number +2348124644470

      https://supernaturalspell1.blogspot.com/

      http://reallovespellcaster.over-blog.com

      THIS MY BLOG

      https://ethanmicheal1.blogspot.com/

      Delete
    2. Divorce and marital breakthrough save your marriage / relationship from breakup and Divorce? you can contact Dr. Raypower through email Urgentspellcast@gmail.com or call him directly or WhatsApp on +1 (424) 330-8109

      Good day everybody, My names are Alicia Leonard i am out here to spread this good news to the entire world on how I got my ex husband back. It all started when my husband cheated on me with another woman unknowing to him that the woman is a wizard, the woman castes a spell on my husband which made my husband change his feelings towards me and the kids and broke our 6 years marriage. I was confused and stressed because of the pains of being a single mother, so i called a friend and explained my marital challenges to her, she instructed and directed me to contact this great powerful spell caster called Dr. Raypower, The main reason why she instructed me to contact Dr Raypower was because in recent times she have read some testimonies on the internet which some people has written about the powerful spell caster Dr Raypower and i was so pleased and i decided to seek for assistance from him which he did a perfect job by casting a spell on my husband and utilise the powers of the other woman which made him to come back to me and beg for forgiveness. I will not stop publishing his name on the net because of the good work he is doing. To everyone with marital problem, divorce issues, lost lover or any relationship related issues, you can contact Dr. Raypower the powerful urgent spell caster via details below
      Email: Urgentspellcast@gmail.com
      Website: http://urgentspellcast.website2.me/
      Blog: https://urgentspellcast.blogspot.com/
      Call/WhatsApp: +1 (424) 330-8109

      Delete
    3. Hi everyone I'm Olivia Hannah and am here to share the wonderful work Dr Raypower did for me. After 5 years in marriage with my husband with 2 kids, my husband started acting weird and going out with other ladies and showed me cold love, on several occasions he threatens to divorce me if I dare question him about his affair with other ladies, I was totally devastated and confused until a old friend of mine told me about a spell caster on the internet called Dr. Raypower who help people with relationship and marriage problem by the powers of love spells, at first I doubted if such thing ever exists but decided to give it a try, when I contact him, he helped me cast a love spell and within 48hours my husband came back to me and started apologizing, now he has stopped going out with other ladies and his with me for good and for real. Contact this great love spell caster for your relationship or marriage problem to be solved today via email: urgentspellcast@gmail.com or Call or WhatsApp: +14243308109.

      Read more about him on his website: http://urgentspellcast.website2.me/ and Blogs: https://urgentspellcast.blogspot.com/

      Delete
    4. Divorce and marital breakthrough save your marriage / relationship from breakup and Divorce? you can contact Dr. Raypower through email Urgentspellcast@gmail.com or call him directly or WhatsApp on +1 (424) 330-8109

      Good day everybody, My names are Alicia Leonard i am out here to spread this good news to the entire world on how I got my ex husband back. It all started when my husband cheated on me with another woman unknowing to him that the woman is a wizard, the woman castes a spell on my husband which made my husband change his feelings towards me and the kids and broke our 6 years marriage. I was confused and stressed because of the pains of being a single mother, so i called a friend and explained my marital challenges to her, she instructed and directed me to contact this great powerful spell caster called Dr. Raypower, The main reason why she instructed me to contact Dr Raypower was because in recent times she have read some testimonies on the internet which some people has written about the powerful spell caster Dr Raypower and i was so pleased and i decided to seek for assistance from him which he did a perfect job by casting a spell on my husband and utilise the powers of the other woman which made him to come back to me and beg for forgiveness. I will not stop publishing his name on the net because of the good work he is doing. To everyone with marital problem, divorce issues, lost lover or any relationship related issues, you can contact Dr. Raypower the powerful urgent spell caster via details below
      Email: Urgentspellcast@gmail.com
      Website: http://urgentspellcast.website2.me/
      Blog: https://urgentspellcast.blogspot.com/
      Call/WhatsApp: +1 (424) 330-8109

      Delete
  2. Tantrik Astrologer Ramdas Ji. in India Best Vashikaran Specialist, Contact Me : +91-9587008635 If you are looking for the cure of your problems with help of vashikaran and black magic then vashikaran specialist ramdas baba ji can be the best motivator in all sorts. You just have to call us and he can perform all the rituals to solve your problem. The spell and mantras of their vashikaran and black magic is too powerful to make your dream come true.

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    ReplyDelete
  3. My name is ethan micheal ,am from USA.i want to share my wonderful testimony on how i got back my husband back, who i sworn ever to be with until when he left me to another woman for no reason and i try to make things work for both of us yet things where getting worse and i love him so much and there is nothing i could do to get my husband back until i met a testimony share by a woman called Stella tea from Australia on the internet talking about a powerful spell caster who brought her husband back within 24hours and i decide to give it a try and to my greatest surprise he also did it for me just as he did for Stella and i have a lot of people complaining of fake spell caster but this one i met was a real spell caster who help me to solve my problem i have no solution to,i introduce many of my best friends that have a similar problems,and their problem were solve with the great help of PRIEST WISDOM .who help them to get back their lovers within 24 hours.i am so happy that my husband is back to me again,and the most surprising thing is that our love is very strong,every day is happiness and joy. and there is nothing like been with the man you love.i am so happy my love is back to me with the help of PRIEST WISDOM if you have similar problem i will advice you to contact him ,he is there to help you and put a smile on your face as he did to me and others.contact email supernaturalspell@yahoo.COM or supernaturalspell1@gmail.com you can call /whatsapp him through is mobile number +2348124644470

    https://supernaturalspell1.blogspot.com/

    http://reallovespellcaster.over-blog.com

    THIS MY BLOG

    https://ethanmicheal1.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  4. A big thanks to dr Ogbefun i never believe that there still exist a real death spell caster after all this years of disappointment from the enormous spammers on the Internet who go about scamming people, until i was opportune to meet Dr Ogbefun a real spell caster, through a close friend called Jennifer who Dr ogbefun had helped before, when i contacted him with his email via ogbefunhearlingtemple@gmail.com i explain how my ex have been giving me problem in my marriage, she never allowed me a moment of peace, and i need to end it by killing her, and i don't want to make use of assassin because it will be risky so i needed to do it in a spiritual way that's why i decided to contact him, he assured me not to worry as i have contacted the right person at the right time, i co-operated with him and in less than a week my ex was dead, she slept and never woke up all thanks to Dr Ogbefun indeed he's really a humble man.
    you can contact ogbefun for any death spell, such as to kill your superior in the office and take his or her place, death spell to kill your father and inherit his wealth ,death spell to kill anyone who have scammed you in the past ,spell for increase in salaries, spell for promotion at the office, spell to get your ex lover back, if things is not working well in your life then you need to contact him now via website https://ogbefunhearlingtem.wixsite.com/spell call or add him on whatsapp +2348102574680

    ReplyDelete
  5. Divorce and marital breakthrough save your marriage / relationship from breakup and Divorce? you can contact Dr. Raypower through email Urgentspellcast@gmail.com or call him directly or WhatsApp on +1 (424) 330-8109

    Good day everybody, My names are Alicia Leonard i am out here to spread this good news to the entire world on how I got my ex husband back. It all started when my husband cheated on me with another woman unknowing to him that the woman is a wizard, the woman castes a spell on my husband which made my husband change his feelings towards me and the kids and broke our 6 years marriage. I was confused and stressed because of the pains of being a single mother, so i called a friend and explained my marital challenges to her, she instructed and directed me to contact this great powerful spell caster called Dr. Raypower, The main reason why she instructed me to contact Dr Raypower was because in recent times she have read some testimonies on the internet which some people has written about the powerful spell caster Dr Raypower and i was so pleased and i decided to seek for assistance from him which he did a perfect job by casting a spell on my husband and utilise the powers of the other woman which made him to come back to me and beg for forgiveness. I will not stop publishing his name on the net because of the good work he is doing. To everyone with marital problem, divorce issues, lost lover or any relationship related issues, you can contact Dr. Raypower the powerful urgent spell caster via details below
    Email: Urgentspellcast@gmail.com
    Website: http://urgentspellcast.website2.me/
    Blog: https://urgentspellcast.blogspot.com/
    Call/WhatsApp: +1 (424) 330-8109.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Excited, My Girlfriend Is Back Am Alexis scorpio from FL Usa my girlfriend cheated on me and asked for breakup. I don't believe at first i try to get back with her but all she told me was she’s with someone else. that she is no longer interested in marrying me at that point i was heart broken coz i love my girlfriend so much that i could not let go off her all of a sudden she left me, i really love her and never can imagine my life without her. not until i came across a powerful real spell caster Dr happy who promise me 24hours urgent love spell to get back with my girlfriend, good twenty-four {24} hours. hmm-mm, it was a good night time at 11:pm within the days that Dr happy told me that my girlfriend will be back, at first i heard the bell rings getting close to my door i heard someone saying honey!!!, it sound familiar i opened the door and i saw my girlfriend standing and weeping in front of me. i was not surprised because its all i have been praying for her to come back home. Guess what 2 weeks after she noticed her system and her body temperature was changed and i took her to clinic for check up and the doctor told me that there is life in her which means she was pregnant i really wants to use this opportunity to thanks Dr happy so much and the love page that directed me to Dr happy if you have any problem getting your ex back, or predicament that is worse or exactly like this you have been into, contact Dr happy on happylovespell2@gmail.com
    Whatsapp/cal +2348133873774
    visit his website...happylovespell2.webnode.com/
    about his love spell Blogs site.http://happylovespel.blogspot.com.ng/

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hi everyone I'm Olivia Hannah and am here to share the wonderful work Dr Raypower did for me. After 5 years in marriage with my husband with 2 kids, my husband started acting weird and going out with other ladies and showed me cold love, on several occasions he threatens to divorce me if I dare question him about his affair with other ladies, I was totally devastated and confused until a old friend of mine told me about a spell caster on the internet called Dr. Raypower who help people with relationship and marriage problem by the powers of love spells, at first I doubted if such thing ever exists but decided to give it a try, when I contact him, he helped me cast a love spell and within 48hours my husband came back to me and started apologizing, now he has stopped going out with other ladies and his with me for good and for real. Contact this great love spell caster for your relationship or marriage problem to be solved today via email: urgentspellcast@gmail.com or Call or WhatsApp: +14243308109.

    Read more about him on his website: http://urgentspellcast.website2.me/ and Blogs: https://urgentspellcast.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  8. Divorce and marital breakthrough save your marriage / relationship from breakup and Divorce? you can contact Dr. Raypower through email Urgentspellcast@gmail.com or call him directly or WhatsApp on +1 (424) 330-8109

    Good day everybody, My names are Alicia Leonard i am out here to spread this good news to the entire world on how I got my ex husband back. It all started when my husband cheated on me with another woman unknowing to him that the woman is a wizard, the woman castes a spell on my husband which made my husband change his feelings towards me and the kids and broke our 6 years marriage. I was confused and stressed because of the pains of being a single mother, so i called a friend and explained my marital challenges to her, she instructed and directed me to contact this great powerful spell caster called Dr. Raypower, The main reason why she instructed me to contact Dr Raypower was because in recent times she have read some testimonies on the internet which some people has written about the powerful spell caster Dr Raypower and i was so pleased and i decided to seek for assistance from him which he did a perfect job by casting a spell on my husband and utilise the powers of the other woman which made him to come back to me and beg for forgiveness. I will not stop publishing his name on the net because of the good work he is doing. To everyone with marital problem, divorce issues, lost lover or any relationship related issues, you can contact Dr. Raypower the powerful urgent spell caster via details below
    Email: Urgentspellcast@gmail.com
    Website: http://urgentspellcast.website2.me/
    Blog: https://urgentspellcast.blogspot.com/
    Call/WhatsApp: +1 (424) 330-8109

    ReplyDelete

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